Like It Matters

“If we can’t find a world view that answers these questions…. Who am I,     Where did I come from, where am I going & Does it really matter …Then we live without significance.”

Alistair Begg

Hello Warriors

It is a great day to be alive!  

I hope you are all registering for the upcoming radio show—if not, stop and do it now—

http://likeitmatters.net/radio-register-1010.html

I am going to be teaching on the Neurological levels of change and specifically, “How change takes place and how to ‘KEEP THE CHANGE’ you have created!  TUNE IN, with journal in hand, heart open, mind focused…and let’s CONTINUE to change our lives and KEEP THE CHANGE!

Speaking of change…I have to share with you an email I got yesterday.  This gentleman is almost 70 years old and a GREAT Leader before he ever came to my class last Thursday Oct 20^th as part of CLASS 620! 

I have his permission to share this email: 

10-27-11

Hello team 620,

I am not as good at words as Mr. Porter but I would like to express my feeling and appreciation to everyone on team 620 for the great experience I had this past weekend. In order to get into the “now” I feel I must first take you back a few years.

In 1965 my employer at the time and after a few years of special training I was sent on a special assignment.  During this assignment it did not take me long to realize that you could not become attached to your fellow co-workers because they may not be there the next day. You led by training and not emotion or passion.  It was okay to be friendly with your co-workers but not a good idea to become to close to them.  As I said, they may not be there then next day, or if you or them did not do your job well they may not be there the next second. 

Upon returning for this assignment I did not receive any “thank you” or “well done” nor even a warm smile or handshake of gratitude.  Instead I was spit upon, cussed, and on several occasions I was forced to fight to protect myself. My employer at that time was the United States Marine Corps and the assignment was in a place called South Vietnam,

“Up until Now”  I have continued to manage as I did then.  Outside of my family I did not show any emotion, passion, or excitement. I was good at my job in meeting deadlines, understanding the technical aspects of my job and became successful. My employer used me in many assignments around the world to “fix” things when they became out of control. No passion, no emotion or having to get close to personal because they may not be there the next day.

Thank you team 620 in showing me that there can be emotion and passion and caring for those outside your immediate family. I now realize, although I have had a successful career, that I could have been much more successful by leaving behind the ‘blocks” of the past.  

I now feel much better by having spent the past month (sorry 3 days but it seemed longer) with you guys. I feel I have become closer to you in 3 days than I have to people I have known my whole life.  Thanks for showing me it is okay to show emotion. Thanks for caring, Thanks for the time you spent in coaching me through the daily exercises.  I will never forget you.

Danny L. Easley

Plant Controller

Motores Reynosa

In 20 years of helping people become more of WHO THEY WERE PUT HERE TO BE…I never get tired of the transformations!

This is real change, change that needed to take place 50 years ago!  Change that was created by COMMITMENT, PASSION, PURPOSE, VISION, FOCUS and being a part of a TEAM who questions!

Some times the key to life is asking the right questions:

• Who am I?
• Why am I here?
• If today was my last day on this planet, did it matter one bit?
• What type of Man\Woman do I want to be?
• Am I the Man\Woman that God put me here to be?
• Is there a God?  And if there is what qualities would He have to possess?
• What do I do with this Jesus?
• Am I lovable?
• Will He\She still love me…if….?

If you have been through any of our classes then you know…most of these questions you have NOT ONLY been asked in our training, but you were to passionately consider them…again, and again, and again…AND AGAIN!

2 things on questioning yourself!

1—Do it often and do it in a place and time where you can truly answer the questions and answer them on paper!  I would highly recommend journaling, and writing these things out.  Why?  Because you could have some “FIRST THOUGHTS”, thoughts that are there for the first time and you want to document them.  OR…You could have some really important things that you need to document, some things that might be sabotaging yourself or hindering your growth.  You want to put them on paper so you can GET THEM OFF your mind!

2—Ask the right type of questions.  Why can be a great question when looking for significance and meaning.  However it can be the worst question when looking to do change work.  Why dig’s up stuff!  And if you are going to dig up stuff, then you want to dig up ‘stuff” that makes you more resourceful…not stuff that makes you depressed or stuck.  

Good use of Why:  Why am I on this planet at this time, occupying this body and taking up space, what is my purpose?

Bad use of why; Why was I molested, why was I abused…why God did you allow this to happen to me?

The first example makes you seek meaning.  The second example brings up some terrible feelings with NO GOOD ANSWER!

Real change is possible, it is probably and it is POWERFUL!  Question yourself and make sure the change you desire is the change you are committed to.  Question yourself and make sure that you are fully powered, emotionally and spiritually to accomplish all the great things that you were put here to do!  

As I like to say in class, “I love the impossible; I get to experience it every weekend in our training!

“If you wonder why it is then that people are groaning like bears and moaning like doves?  It is because they don’t know who they are, they don’t know why they’re here, they don’t know where they’re going and don’t have a clue if it even matters!”

– Alistair Begg

Join us on our radio show on Tuesday, November 1 for the Neurological Levels of Change and we will all be questioning ourselves to a better future!

With Passion-HBS

Scott V. Black

Small is the number of people who see with their eyes and think with their minds.

~Albert Einstein 

Hello Warriors….

I am angry…are you angry?  I look at the newspapers and I watch the news and I walk with people, in our training, at a deep, emotional place.  Man’s inhumanity to man is well documented…and it sometimes makes me ANGRY! 

Known and loved by many for his songs of nonviolence and world peace, Pete Seeger used say that inside his guitar case, he kept a rock.

He would then explain: “I get real angry sometimes when I see what’s going on in the world, and I like to wrap my fingers around that rock and hold it for a while before I put it back.”

Then, pausing for effect, he would add, “But someday if the music stops working, I might have to use that rock.”

What are you angry about?

The trick is to be angry about the right things.

Bob Pierce, the founder of World Vision wrote: “Let my heart be broken by the things that break the heart of God.”

What breaks your heart?

Are you angry?

Do you have a burden?

Is there a burning desire at the heart of your soul?

Aristotle wrote: “Anybody can become angry that is easy; but to be angry with the right person, and to the right degree, and at the right time, and for the right purpose, and in the right way that is not within everybody’s power and is not easy.”

Earlier theologians didn’t feel the need to mask that word anger with all sorts of lingo and euphemisms.

Augustine put it like this: “Hope has two daughters, Anger and Courage. Anger at the way things are, and Courage to make things other than they are.”

This righteous indignation can burn you out.

If the anger is too intense you cannot sustain – you will melt.

The key is to keep the anger smoldering over the long haul.

Myles Horton was the founder of the Highlander Center.

This was the training center for dozens of the nation’s most influential civil rights workers.

This is the place where Martin Luther King Jr. heard Pete Seeger sing the song “We Will Overcome,” and came away resolving to adopt and adapt the song with one significant change - “We Shall Overcome”.

This became the theme song of the civil rights movement.

In his autobiography, Horton has this to say about his mission:

“I had to turn my anger into a slow - burning fire, instead of a consuming fire.  You don’t want the fire to go out - you never let it go out - and if it ever gets weak, you stoke it.  But you don’t want it to burn you up.  It keeps you going, but you subdue it because you don’t want to be destroyed by it.” Myles Horton

Today how will you use your anger, your frustration with the world to make you an agent of change?  How will you intelligently use your emotions to affect change?

Emotional Intelligence is the right emotion, with the right intensity, at the right time, directed toward the right person in the right way!

It is good to BURN for change and to BURN for possibilities and HOPE.  Focus your FIRE in a positive direction and notice the effects it has on those around you! 

TODAY…BURN, BABY…BURN!  Set some GREAT FIRES of change and Passion that stir up your world and the world around you!!

With Passion-HBS

Scott V. Black

EXCITED:

1. That others are stepping up since Mark said he was leaving yesterday.
2. That my future is NOW!
3. That I have love in my life and there are a few who really do care!
4. For the radio show next week.
5. For Valerie to join the team at a deeper level!

GRATEFUL:

1. For the incredible emails I have received from Team 620
2. For all the starfish that Team 620 has put into trainings this week!
3. To be Daddy to Faith, Christian and Major Black.
4. That I get to have something that most never get to have!!!
5. That, “We are chasing something our parents never tracked towards”!!
6. That ROMANTIC love is possible today, and that it is delicious…just CRAZY good!
7. That God is asking me to step outside of my Mark “comfort zone”. 
8. For the wonderful talk that Val had with her Mom last night.
9. That He that began the good works in me will see them through to the end.
10. Greater is He who is in me, then He who is in the world!

Hello Warriors—

If you watch the news and are aware of what is going on in the world and in our country, there is much FEAR.  Hopelessness and Helplessness seem to be the worry and fear of our times.  There is fear and worry about many things:

• Does he\she love me?
• Will I find a job?
• How will I pay the house payment?
• Where is the money coming from?
• Will things get better?
• What is our government doing?
• Will our kids have any future:

………………………………………………..

Those of you who are parents, executives or leaders know that when something is really important to them, it is noticed in the repetition of their message.  If something is important, if it is a value then we are usually espousing those things over and over. 

I believe that the Bible is the inerrant word of God.  I believe God never says something, just to say it.  If God says something more than once then it is even more important.  The Bible says almost 400 times, “Do Not Fear, Do Not Worry”.  It must be really important…Parents why do you tell your kids some things over and over?

IT IS REALLY IMPORTANT!!

So what is FEAR…?

Mozart’s Brain and the Fighter Pilot, Dr. Richard Restak.

Neurologist, neuropsychiatrist, Clinical Professor of Neurology,

George Washington University.

“Fear Occurs before you know what you’re afraid of”, as brain researcher Joseph LeDoux explains.  LeDoux’s research into emotions provides the basis for our understanding of intuition. 

Here is an example.  In a laboratory study here is what they learned….

If a rat in a cage is exposed to a sound, the animal initially orients itself toward and pays attention to the sound, but after a few repetitions, the rat ignores it.  However, the animal will respond once again if the sound is paired with an electrical shock.  After a few repetitions of this pairing of sound and shock, the rat begins to display signs of fear whenever it hears the sound alone.  It stops what it is doing and freezes in place.  The animal’s only detectable movement consists of the rhythmic chest excursions that accompany breathing.  In addition, the rat’s fur stands on end, its blood pressure and heart rate increase, and stress hormones pour into its bloodstream.(This is the chemical reaction of the body based on our feelings)  In a word, the rat is now “conditioned” so that the sound, when presented alone, will elicit the fear response.  This response is not different than what occurs when the rat encounters its natural enemy, the cat. 

He goes on to say…”We humans can be fear conditioned, too. 

FEAR is an acronym

False

Evidence

Appearing

Real

Here is the problem since nobody responds to reality, but their “map of reality” we need to use a different acronym:

False

Emotions

About

Reality-(Our version of what we think it is)

I have to remind myself this:

YOU ARE NOT WHAT YOU FEEL!!

The only control FEAR has on us, it what we give it.  Courage, by definition must have the presence of Fear.  As Dr. Suzanne Jeffers wrote in her great book, “Feel the fear and do it anyway”. 

What we focus on more and more becomes real.  Worry is a form of fear; so we attempt to play God and “WORRY” about everything.  As we continue to play the possibilities of what we are worried about and the possible outcomes—The body starts releasing chemicals and we start getting anxious, sick to our stomach, tight jaw, headaches…

Can you say PSYCHO SEMATIC?

Worry is paying interest on money we might not owe!

However, when we continue to focus on the fear, the worry, we give it life.  Suicide, Depression, PTSD; all Fears that create realities that destroy jobs, families, countries and people.  When emotions and feelings become real and increase in intensity, it creates a reality that causes us much physical and emotional pain.  This pain has consequences to our health and our relationships.

Here is the cool thing about FEAR-it is a phony!  When you confront FEAR and move through it, then it dissipates and becomes familiar—thus taking away its pain, thus ceasing to be FEAR!

So today take a look at what you are worried about, afraid of and embrace it!  Move beyond it, put fear in its proper place—BEHIND YOU!!!  Like Jesus said to His best friend on this planet, Peter,  “BEHIND ME…!”

With Passion-HBS

Scott V. Black

Hello Warriors…

Do you remember where you were 10 years ago?  That is something we will be hearing a lot of over this weekend as we commemorate the 10 year anniversary of the largest terrorist attack against the ideals and freedoms we hold dear.  

Let me suggest the question is better asked not in the physical realm, but in the spirit realm, in the “personal growth” realm.  Where were you 10 years ago emotionally and psychologically in your life?  Today, compared to 10 years ago…;

•  Are you doing better with your attitude?
•  Are you closer to your goals?
•  Are your relationships more intimate?
•  Are you closer to the person you were put here to be?
•  Is your walk with God closer?
•  Has your knowledge of life and wisdom grown?

This weekend when you are reflecting on where you “where 10 years ago”, consider who are you today?

As I have been saying for many years, before Sept 11, and continue to speak the truth today…PLANES CRASH AND PEOPLE DIE, IN THE WINK OF AN EYE…

…SO HOW ARE YOU GOING TO LIVE YOUR LIFE LIKE IT MATTERS…so that no matter how much time you spend on this planet, it was worth it?  Your life has value!  And others in your life should have value.  

You might be telling people all kinds of things, but what are your actions saying?  Where are you saying things like this;

•  I love you…
•  You are the leader in my life…
• You are my best friend…
• You saved my life…
• I owe you my life…

Saying those things with your words, but your actions are saying something else…words are nothing but a whole bunch of letters put together without the energy to back them up.  We all know the saying; 

A PICTURE IS WORTH 1000 WORDS

What message are your actions sending?  Love is not a FEELING, it is a VERB!  What are you doing to make those people who matter feel valued…?

It is time to remember, again and make those people feel they have value!

……………………………………………………………………………….

A hard working man came home from work late again, tired and irritated to find his 6-year old son waiting for him at the door.

“Daddy, May I ask you a question?’

“Yeah, sure, what is it?” replied the man.

“Daddy, how much money do you make an hour?”

“That’s none of your business!  What makes you ask such a thing?” the man said angrily.

“I just want to know.  Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?”, pleaded the little boy.

“If you need to know, I make $20.00 an hour.”

“Oh,” the little boy replied, head bowed.  Looking up, he said, “Daddy, may I borrow $10.00 please?”

The father was furious.  “The only reason you wanted to know how much money I made is just so you can borrow some to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense.  You march yourself straight to your room and go to bed.  I work my butt off for you, you think about how selfish you are being.  I work long, hard hours everyday and don’t have time for such foolish things, especially right when I come home at the end of a hard day.”

The little boy quietly went to his room; his head bowed and shut the door.  The man sat down and was beside himself.  “Nobody around here appreciates anything I do.  What am I just an ATM machine?”  After stewing about this for about an hour, he started feeling somewhat guilty for how hard he was on his son.  

Maybe there was something the little boy really needed to buy with that money, he didn’t really ask for money very often, the man thought to himself.  The man, feeling somewhat guilty, went to the door of the little boy’s room and opened the door.

“Are you asleep son?” he asked.

“No, daddy, I’m awake,” replied the boy.

“I’ve been thinking, maybe I was too hard on your earlier,” said the man.

“It’s been a long day and I took my aggravation out on you, here’s the $10 you asked for”.

The little boy sat straight up, beaming.

“Oh, thank you daddy!” he yelled.  Then, reaching under his pillow, he pulled out some more crumpled up bills.

The man seeing the boy already had money, started to get angry again.  The little boy slowly counted out his money and then looked back up at his dad.

“Why did you want more money if you already had some?” the father grumbled.

“Because I didn’t have enough, but now I do,” the little boy replied.

“Daddy, I have $20 now, can I buy an hour of your time so we can have some daddy-son time together?”

With Passion and Pain—

Scott V. Black

You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life 

Winston Churchill

Hello Warriors

I am getting ready to do a Leadership Adventure class tomorrow.  As I get ready to take the next step beyond LEADERSHIP AWAKENING, I am reminded of the 4 C’s of Leadership that the team will experience the next 3 days.

Over the last month, I have been blogging about the 4 + 1 C’s of Leadership.  Today I want to reflect on the +1, or the 5th C which is called;

CONSISTENCY

  Let me remind you of the 4 C’s of Leadership:

• Commitment
• Clear Vision
• Communication
• Consensus

Once those 4 C’s are in place, then and only then does the “+1”, or 5th C come into play.  Why, you might ask?  Because it is the definition of insanity…in a different way!  Most of you know the definition of insanity; I think the quote gets credited to Albert Einstein:

                       “Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results”.

That is the definition of insanity, but as crazy as that is, and it is crazy, think about this… How crazy it would be to “lock in place” a pattern that is getting you results you don’t like, doesn’t motivate you nor inspire you…doesn’t work for you?  Talk about insanity!!!!

Consistency is about guaranteeing results, about performance and patterns.  There are patterns all around us in life.  In accounting, we call these Standard Accounting Practices.  In government, cultural situations we call these “customs or norms”.  We have regulations and ‘approval processes”…all are patterns.

My forte is in Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP), which is really about the ability to identify patterns and connecting them with results that one desires. 

The part of Leadership Awakening that creates the “Awakening’ is that people become “Aware of being unaware”.  They leave the training with a higher level of “sensory acuity”. 

When graduates leave our training they go home and their senses are heightened.  They are seeing, not just looking…or judging.  They are empathically listening, not just hearing words.  They are feeling things they have never felt, or haven’t felt in a long time…things like Passion, Empathy, Desire…Burning…on fire!

Part of the Awareness is of the patterns in their lives that have created the results that they are experiencing.  We have to remind ourselves, that nobody responds to reality, we respond to our own personal map of reality!  To know someone’s map of reality is to know their patterns, their rules, their belief systems that govern everything they do, or do not do!

Those that are able to identify those patterns and actively participate in them are those that go the furthest in their life and Career.  And when we can identify these patterns and process them through those “life altering” questions like:

• Who am I?
• What do I want?
• Where am I now, where am I going, what will it take to get there and how long?
• If today was my last day on this planet, did it matter one bit?  Did I become the person I was put here to be?

Then we are living a life of purpose, ON FIRE…Living our lives like they matter- Because they Do!

In Business these patterns are called, SOP—Standard Operating Procedures. I have traveled the country delivering a great speech\training to select groups called, “The Pattern of Success”.  When I bring up the term S.O.P., I always ask the question, “Why are they SOP”?  You know what a typical answer I get is…”Because that is the way we have always done it”!  The right answer should be; “Because it works!”

There are patterns all around us.  Most are totally unaware of the patterns, thus feel out of control of their lives.  Once we identify the pattern then we can ask ourselves the all important question;

                          Is this getting me what I want?

If the answer is yes, S.O.P., lock it up!  If the answer is NO, then adapt or change the pattern to create a new pattern!  Run that pattern and identify the new pattern.  Once the new pattern is identified, ask that all important question;

                         Is this getting me what I want? 

Continue to loop until you have S.O.P. that WORKS! 

Today take a look at anything in your life that is not getting you the results you want.  Take it through this three step process:

1. Identify how you are getting the results you are getting.  What is the pattern that is playing here?
2. If this pattern is not getting you what you want…what can you do differently to change the outcome so it is more in line with what you want?
3. Clearly identify the new pattern—In order to do this you need to have “run” the pattern to see what the results are.

Pick out one area in your personal life and one area in your business life and do this simple exercise.  You will be amazed at how much more control you have in what you are getting! 

Living life like it Matters…

With Passion-HBS

Scott V. Black

I have met the enemy and he is living in my shorts!

Hello Warriors-

I am in L.A. getting ready to take Team 612 through the Valley and then onto the mountain top!

Before every class I get to a place where I am STIRRED up so that I can get others stirred up.  How does one take people who are already doing pretty good and get them to the point that they are willing to “Raise the Bar” and not accept the contentment of “GOOD NUFF”?  I have to show them the TRUTH and have them consider that as good as they are doing, maybe…just maybe then can do better and they NEED to do better. 

We are in interesting times…a time where people are losing their homes, their jobs, their dreams, their hope and a vision for a future!  Consider:

• 50 Million Americans are on anti-depressants.
• Those that haven’t lost their houses are finding them worth less than they owe.
• 13% of all houses in America are now vacant!
• Double digit unemployment\under-employment for years and for years to come; possibly.
• At least 1 in 5 Americans are on some sort of government assistance.
• Foreclosure rates are at record levels, and staying at record levels.
• As many Americans are on FOOD STAMPS as ANIT-DEPRESANTS

There is an epidemic in this world, in this country; it is called helpless and hopeless.

Remember there is a good book out there that says, “Without a VISION, people perish”.   When people have no hope, no VISION can POPULATE their hearts and their minds!

Last night I was watching FoxNews and there was a story about how the suicide rate in the military was at record levels.  The rate is actually higher than the civilian world.  Some of the points that struck me- struck me so powerfully that at 1am I got up and wrote them down:

• Most of those who committed suicide were NEVER deployed.
• All have one thing in common, a broken heart.
• It is a societal issue, not a military issue.   The military is like the “canary in the minefield”;  a harbinger of what is to come.

The person being interviewed was a high ranking commander and there were a couple of quotes that stuck out enough for me to write them down:

Leadership is about letting people know it is not a sign of weakness to ask for help.

Today’s Marines know it is just as important to be psychologically fit as it is to be physically fit.

Let me bring some hope to this hopeless situation…

EMPOWER U…

LIVING YOUR LIFE LIKE IT MATTERS! 

THE TOOLS THAT WE TEACH IN OUR TRAININGS

TURNING ON THE NUCLEAR REACTOR OF THE HEART

 It is a mind set; it is a way to FRAME our experience.  When we realize our lives are NOT ABOUT US!  We were created for something far greater than just living our life…then we can LIVE LIFE…LIKE IT MATTERS!  When we get our focus off of our struggles and invest in other people, things look different.  When we realize that the pain we have been through allows us to help get others out of their pain, then it has value.  When you can find meaning in anything, even suffering then it has value!  Dr. Viktor Frankl called that LOGO THERAPY!

One of the keys to life—

To consistently frame our experience of life in a way that allows us to be more resourceful for ourselves and others!

I have met the enemy and he is living in my shorts!  A majority of depression is caused by our self talk.  If other people said to us, what we say in our heads…we would kill them!  I have met the enemy and he is living in my shorts!

Why do I do what I do…?

I know what it is like to struggle with depression,

I know what it is like to feel helpless and hopeless,

I know what it is like to let the enemy in my head shred my heart,

I know what it is like to be tripping on mental IED’s(Improvised Exploding Devices) that were put up by me, by the enemy who is living in MY SHORTS!

Ladies and gentlemen TODAY, let’s be HOPE PEDDLERS! 

When we live our lives like they matter that gives other people permission to do the same.   

One of the best ways to do that is to invest in others, to be aware of what is going on around you and help those that seem helpless.  Today OPEN YOUR EYES, OPEN YOUR EARS, OPEN YOUR HEART! 

Today reach out to someone, walk with them in their struggles and give a helping hand.  Maybe that is words of encouragement, a few dollars, removing a burden from their backs.  I am not sure what you can do…but do something!

If not you, then who?  IF not now, then when?

Planes crash and people take their lives every day…you just might save a life today!

When you are committed to changing, nay, saving lives…what better way is there to live your life like it matters!

It is a well formed goal, a self-fulfilling prophecy; 

WHEN YOU LIVE YOUR LIFE LIKE IT MATTERS-IT DOES!

With Passion-HBS

Scott V. Black

“If we want to feel special, we have to be special.  If we want to leave a mark, we have to make a mark.  If we want a life of purpose and meaning, we have to live with purpose and meaning”    Scott V Black

The science of how the brain codes learning and experience.  This coding affects all communication and behavior.  It affects how you learn and how you experience the world around you.  It is a key to reaching and achieving excellence.

In it’s simplest, self-defined manner, NLP is Neuro Linguistic Programming:

•  “Neuro” is our Neurology-how we think and feel.
•  “Linguistic” is the language part- what we say, how we say it and how we are influenced by what we hear.
•  “Programming”-is how we act to achieve our results.

What else?…

•  The study of structure of subjective experience.
•  NLP is about distinction and organization.  How do you organize ‘stuff’.
• Original research on understanding the human experience…JC?
• The ability to understand human patterns and to adjust those patterns so we can be as resourceful as we want to be.
• At its core NLP is about Goals and Choice.
• Practical technology for the achievement o our goals and choices.
• The owner’s manual to the human experience.
• NLP is about the PATTERNS in our Lives…HOW DO WE DO ‘IT’…?
• NLP is not a philosophy, it is a technology.

NLP only has value in the presence of desire!

What do you want…and what has kept you from accomplishing it…UP UNTIL NOW!

Success in any endeavor does not happen by accident. Rather, it’s the result of deliberate decisions, conscious effort, and immense persistence — all directed at specific goals.

~Gary Ryan Blair

Hello Warriors

I have been blogging on the 4+1 C’s of Leadership;

• Commitment
• Clear Vision
• Communication
• Consensus

Consensus is defined simply;

Majority of opinion:

or

General agreement or concord; harmony

Consensus is about GAINING AGREEMENT.  Those that have been through Leadership Awakening or Leadership Adventure know about AGREEMENT GAINING SKILLS; Projection, Enthusiasm, Eye Contact, Voice Inflection and Content.  That is not what I am talking about here, although they are the foundations for any agreement gaining presentation! 

What I am talking about is getting “buy in”.  Consensus is about everybody going in the same direction!  The best way to do that is gain agreement on outcomes and reasons why.  Remember Nietzsche’s quote;

He who has a why, can bear almost any how!

When we come to a common agreement, when we are ONE team, then Consensus can occur!  In order for that to take place we must have the confidence to speak our heart and to get people “on board” for the mission.  In order to do that we need to be able to sell our idea, our opinions, our reason “why”!  What is selling?  Selling is nothing more than gaining agreement from someone to buy your product, your service, your hand in marriage…whatever you are selling! 

The number one problem I run into that shows up when there is lack of consensus, is lack of belief from the leader.  Everything we do, or do not do is driven by a belief system.  Unless someone is committed to the cause, is aware of the ‘why’ of the mission, then no true consensus can take place.  That doesn’t’ mean your team won’t be “doing” things and having meetings, it just means that they are not ‘bought’ in and thus, won’t “lay it on the line”.  Which means “GOODNUFF” is taking place.  People are doing their job, they are showing up, doing stuff.

Again, when I am talking about Consensus, I am talking about building it with the team, but also to be congruent with ourselves.  Congruent is great word in the field of leadership, it means that your words and your actions are the same.  In other words the person believes what they are saying and they do what they are saying.  Their words and their actions are the same, they are congruent. 

The only way for that to take place is for the leader to truly believe in what is happening.  The first sale that takes place is not with the team, not with management, but with ones self.  I have been told that I could sell ice to Eskimos and I always reply, “Yes, if I believe they needed it!”  We must have the strength of our convictions if we are to truly build consensus, to gain agreement with our team on whatever it is we are doing.

So today how about you do a little selling, not to anybody else but to yourself!  This week I have been “re creating” some habits that I stopped doing when things were going “well”.  I have been setting my alarm clock early in the am and getting up at 5am.  I do some reading, spend some time with God and I get my thinking right!  I can’t control the economy, I can’t control who pays me or doesn’t pay me…but I can control my thinking, my doing and my feelings! 

What if every morning you set your mind right and got your heart in CONGRUENCE with your thinking and your vision?  Do you realize how much more powerful you would be?  In tough times, like we are going through, it is time to go back to the basics!  Focus on the foundation when the storms of life are rocking you! 

In closing, I thought I would share this funny picture.  Things are tough for a lot of people and tougher for more and sometimes I just have to laugh.  I live a hectic life, organized chaos I have heard to describe it.  I am juggling many things as a single dad, a business owner, a man who is driven to make this world a bit better…and I can forget keys, or lock myself out.  When I am frustrated I can really beat up on myself for the little things.

So If there are any of you out there that know what I am talking about…you will enjoy this.  It seems like even “leaders of the free world’ experience similar things…

http://washingtonexaminer.com/blogs/beltway-confidential/2011/03/video-even-president-obama-gets-locked-out-oval-office

With Passion-HBS

Scott V. Black

Everything can be taken from a person but one thing: the last of human freedoms — to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.

~Viktor E. Frankl

Hello Warriors…

What an interesting time we live in!  I have the honor of interacting with many people at a very intimate place.  Not only do I GET TO be a part of some amazing growth in our processes of Leadership Awakening, Leadership Adventure and our EQ: Communicating w\Power class—but I also get to continue to connect with some after class. 

I enjoy following up with people and hearing their success stories, but I also want to be a resource as we all move forward.  Our training will not make anybody perfect, IMPOSSIBLE to do!  Our training does NOT solve all your problems or make all the bad stuff go away, IMPOSSIBLE!

The last 3 years have been tough for me, for Empower U and for many of you out there.  I can’t even begin to tell you how much pain our graduates are going through due to the economy and the decline of American leadership and ethics.  I get to walk and talk with people on a daily basis and I feel the pain! 

John MacArthur when speaking about Leadership notes the common grievous issues that leaders face:

1.)  Being fatigued.

2.)  Being overwhelmed.

3.)  Not being liked.

4.)  Babysitting the self-centered.

5.)  Making decisions in times of crisis.

6.)  Bearing the pain of others.

If a person cannot deal with these common grievous issues, then they will ultimately fail as a leader.

I know that pain!  I hear it on a daily basis…and I live it on a daily basis.  Not only do I have empathy, and walk in others pain, I have tons of my own pain!!  I am not a guru, I am not this perfect person to be put on a pedestal…I am a flawed, broken (hu)man…just like the rest of you!

A great life is born in the soul, grown in the mind, and lived from the heart.

Suzanne Zoglio

The problem with the quote above is it is HARD to live from the heart when we feel the tank is empty.  When we have nothing to pay the bank, to pay the power company, to pay the insurance company…to pay the tax man…to pay attention to the needs of others and ourselves.

We are in a financial crisis in this country, and it seems like our lack of “Values” is causing us to dig the hole deeper and deeper and blame everybody else!  I hear so many people are BROKE today!  But, my fear is far more are BROKEN!  What an interesting two words…same word, just one has a little “n” at the end. 

I talk to people everyday that are broke!  This has always been the case, which is why I never let money be a reason why someone can’t change their life through our training!  However, lately, the last year plus, I am coming across more and more BROKEN people!  People I talk to who went through my training years ago, or months ago, that have been abused by life.  They feel like life is piling on…that life should get a 15 yard penalty for “unnecessary roughness”.  Their will, their spirit is BROKEN!

King Solomon is considered the wisest man to ever live.  Even people, who do not believe in God or do not prescribe to the fact that the bible is the inspired word of God, will study King Solomon for his wisdom and his wealth secrets.  King Solomon wrote the book of Proverbs early in his reign.  In chapter 18, verse 14 he said;

The human spirit can endure a sick body, but who can bear a crushed spirit(Broken)?

The word BROKE has many definitions, I have listed a couple pertaining to my use of the word:

–adjective

without money; penniless.

bankrupt.

—Idioms

go broke,

to become destitute of money or possessions.

to go bankrupt: In that business people are forever going broke.

The word BROKEN also has many definitions; I have listed a couple pertaining to my use of the word:

–adjective

2.

reduced to fragments; fragmented.

3.

ruptured; torn; fractured.

4.

not functioning properly; out of working order.

infringed or violated: A broken promise is a betrayal of trust.

9.

interrupted, disrupted, or disconnected: After the phone call he returned to his broken sleep.

10.

weakened in strength, spirit, etc.: His broken health was due to alcoholism.

11.

tamed, trained, or reduced to submission: The horse was broken to the saddle.

I KNOW OF WHAT YOU SPEAK!  I am walking in it with you!  I am not sitting on my pedestal and pretending to know what you are going through!

I am broke.  I have no money to pay my employees, to pay hotels, to pay for my kid’s school.  Lately, though I have felt broken!  I have felt;

Infringed or violated.

Weakened in strength and spirit.

Not functioning properly

Ruptured fractured.

Reduced to fragments, fractured!

See broke in the financial sense is too much outgoing, and not enough incoming.  That we cannot always control.  Economies go up and down.  People say they appreciate you , but hold onto their money and won’t help.  How many “people of God” are not broke, have financial retirement accounts and are doing pretty well…while they watch their brothers and sisters lose their home, their dreams, their hope and “pray” for them, but keep their money locked up tight?  Those are things we cannot control!

But Broken is a state of mind, of the heart, of the will!  Broken is to be defeated and to virtually give up!  When that happens we have to go to the basics.  As a believer in God, that is the word of God to me.  It is digging deep down and seeking God’s wisdom and guidance.  And it is about getting back to the basics. 

For those that don’t believe in the God of the bible, those basics are:

 —CBT(Cognitive Behavorial Treatment),

—focusing each morning of 5 things excited about and 5 things grateful for,

—it is about “triggering” the anchors of the music that was attached to the ear of the mind,

— it is to go on staff, go to graduation, talk with Mr. Black…talk to a teammate.

All those things will help those of us that are broken!  It takes courage to not stay there!  Yes, I said it…Courage!  It won’t be easy, quit looking for easy.  Life is NOT fair, so we have to put our big boy pants on!

Once you show that courage, you will find that there is another definition of BROKEN…one I prefer:

go for broke, to exert oneself or employ one’s resources to the utmost.

Ah….delicious…but it will take pressing the GO button and having courage, as Teddy Roosevelt once said:

It is not the critic who counts.  Not how the strong man stumbled or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.  The credit belongs to the person who is in the arena.  Who face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly.  Who comes up short again and again.  Who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions and spend themselves in a worthy cause. Who at the worse, if they fail, at least fail while daring greatly…So that their place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither defeat, nor victory!

 You can do this!  I believe in you!  Pick yourself up and dust yourself off and hit it again!  YOU ARE NOT CALLED TO A SPIRIT OF FEAR AND WORRY!  You are better than that!

Just focus and Do It!  See you on the other side!  I have heard it is DELCIOUS it is INTOXICATING!  I will save you some!

With Passion-HBS

Scott V. Black